Elsa is a wonderful inmate here at the prison who comes from Southern France. Her English isn't quite as strong as her French or Spanish, but that's still 2 more languages than I have, so I'm not judging- especially since I decided to spend my year abroad in an English speaking country and she has chosen to challenge herself and come to New Zealand.
Elsa found out about a job opportunity in the Hawke's Bay area at a centre for Autistic kids. It's on a farm called Hohepa that's about a 15 minute drive from Napier, so she asked Rachel, the only inmate with a car, if she could grab a ride out for a job interview. Rachel agreed, and since I had finished my shift and had nothing better to do, I jumped in the car to see a bit more of the area surrounding Napier.
When Elsa looked up directions to the farm on Google, they seemed straightforward enough. From the downtown area, you head west and then take a few turns before you're on the road that will take you right to Hohepa. So she scribbled down a few street names and off we went.
Rachel had just purchased her car, and was still getting used to driving on the other side of the road. This is challenging enough to do in general, but in this case the stress of trying to find a new place along with all the other traffic on the road made it downright difficult. I had driven on the 'other side' when I was in the Coromandel, and understood the feeling perfectly, so I was very empathetic to Rachel's stress.
Unfortunately, Elsa hadn't sketched out a map, and pronounced the street names in a way that Rachel and I couldn't understand. When we came to roundabouts, Rachel would ask which way we should go, and Elsa had trouble using clear, concise English directions like "Take the second exit on your right". There was more of the "Go there" and "Turn here" variety, when "there" and "here" could have been three different directions at once. The stress levels in the car were rising rapidly, and Elsa was supposed to be at her interview for one o'clock. We ended up in Ahuriri, which is another area of Napier and in the complete opposite direction of where we were supposed to be heading. An exasperated Elsa told Rachel she was going the wrong way, and an equally exasperated Rachel complained that Elsa wasn't giving proper directions. We kept going in circles as we tried to get back to the correct road, and it was 12:58. Elsa was swearing in the general direction of Rachel and asked if she could just drive the car herself, but Rachel said no and seemed like she was going to kick Elsa out of the car. Soon enough, she snapped. "Okay Elsa, you should have drawn a map. I am not going to drive you, this isn't working. We are going back to prison."
"... What?"
"Yup"
"PUTAIN!"
At this point, my phone finally loaded directions to the place using my fancy-dandy GPS. I told Rachel I knew how to get there, and asked her if she was still willing to go. Ever the angel, she agreed and I quietly started directing her while Elsa swore in the back seat.
After driving in the correct direction for 5 minutes, Elsa looked around and said, "We are going?"
"Yes Elsa. Danielle knows how to get there."
"RACHEL! THANK YOU RACHEL! THANK YOU!"
"Yup".
We arrived seven minutes late, but it didn't seem to be a problem. We agreed to meet back at the car in an hour. Unfortunately for Rachel and I, we were in the middle of farmland and there wasn't much to do. There was a large cemetery though, so we started wandering through it and chatting/decompressing from the drive up. There was a very pretty rose garden with each bush dedicated to a loved one who had passed. It was quite peaceful.
After the hour was up, we returned to the car. Elsa had a good interview, and we were able to get back to Napier without any trouble.
If I was in the drivers seat, I may have had a brain aneurysm. In the passengers seat, it was a highly entertaining way to spend my afternoon.
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